Saturday, October 29, 2011

Article: A Mother's Story: Raising Awareness for Domestic Violence

ARBOR VITAE - In October, the color pink often overshadows the color purple. And while raising awareness for breast cancer is important, a Northwoods mother wants more people to be aware of domestic violence.

Fourteen years ago her daughter’s fiance beat her to death with a baseball bat. This is her story...

“Kim was a lot like me, big hearted and thought she could cure the world,” describes Anna Marie Zersen.

And at 26-years-old, Kimberly Lange was a typical young woman. She had a good job, liked spending time with her friends and wanted to find a husband and settle down.

“He was good looking, dressed very well,” Zersen says.

Kimberly met Steven Trepanier near her apartment in Gurnee, Illinois. He was a man she thought was smart and successful. They moved in together and were engaged in six months.

“She says mom, after I get married and have children, I'm going to raise them just like you raised me,” Zersen says.

It seemed picture perfect, but not to Kim's mother, Anna Marie Zersen from Arbor Vitae.

“I wasn't hearing from Kim during the night time at home.”

And Kim's love for her fiance turned lethal.

“He took a baseball bat and beat her head in,” Zersen recalls.

In the early morning hours of January 11, 1997, Kim was out with her friends. After calling Kim several times, Steven convinced her to come home. She did, he was drunk, and he took his jealousy out on Kim.

“I cannot say my daughter died, I have to say my daugther was murdered,” Zersen says, through tears.

Gurnee Police Commander Jay Patrick tells us it was one of the worst scenes he has ever seen. Though Anna Marie never saw it, she'll never forget how she found out her only child was dead.

“I answered and I looked at his face and I said, 'Please don't tell me. Please don't tell me she's gone, please’," Zersen remembers.

And while Kim's death was 14 years ago, domestic violence homicides still happen. In Wisconsin alone last year, 51 people died. That's a number advocates here in the Northwoods say can be changed.

“Abusive nature is nothing that a person is born with, it is something that is learned somewhere along the way in a lifetime. It can be unlearned,” says Lynn Feldman, domestic violence counselor with the Tri-County Council on Domestic Violence and Sexual Assault.

“I just want young women and women to realize that there is help and they should call for help,” Zersen says.

And because she doesn't want it to happen to anyone else's daughter.

“No one knows what you go through when that child is gone.”

“That is the ultimate injustice in the universe is to have to bury a child,” says Shellie Holmes, Executive Director of Tri-County Council on Domestic Violence and Sexual Assault.

“I have no guilt at all, I only have happy memories of her,” Zersen says.

Steven Trepanier shot himself after he killed Kim and, according to police reports, died 12 hours later.

Anna Marie says the only good she can find in her daughter’s death is preventing another with her story...and the color purple.

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